Anxiety: Messenger From the Deep Corners of the Psyche

Anxiety is something many of us experience, and for some, it feels like a constant companion. Often, we’re told to reduce stress, calm down, or simply relax. But what if the approach to anxiety isn’t about getting rid of it, but learning to work with it? Understanding anxiety as a part of your awareness and not your enemy can completely change the way you experience it.

Let’s begin with this idea: anxiety happens when something hidden in your subconscious is trying to rise to your conscious awareness. That tight feeling in your chest or those racing thoughts? They’re signals. They’re telling you that something inside you wants to be seen, understood, or processed. So, rather than treating anxiety as a problem to fix, what if we treated it as an opportunity to listen?

Here’s where it gets tricky.

The natural instinct most of us have when we feel anxious is to escape it. We want to distract ourselves, suppress it, or “fix” it. But the truth is, trying to avoid anxiety often makes it worse. Anxiety doesn’t like being ignored; it wants your attention. Think of it like an alarm going off in your mind if you keep hitting the snooze button, it’ll just get louder.

So, what do we do instead? We choose and make a radical decision: to allow ourselves to feel the anxiety. This doesn’t mean we’re giving in to it or letting it take over our lives. It means we’re creating space to let it exist without judgment. Imagine anxiety as a crying baby. You don’t leave the baby alone in another room and hope it stops crying. You pick it up, hold it close, and say, “I’m here for you.” Anxiety needs that same kind of attention.

When you feel anxiety creeping in, try this: pause for a moment and acknowledge it. You don’t have to fight it or push it away. Instead, say to yourself, “Okay, anxiety, I feel you. Let’s sit with this together.” You’re not shutting it out, and you’re not letting it run wild. You’re holding space for it.

Just like a parent multitasking with a baby strapped to their chest, you can feel your anxiety and still move through your day. So It’s not about ignoring it, but about taking it along for the ride.

Now, it’s important to know that not all anxiety feels manageable in this way. There are times when anxiety can be overwhelming when it takes over your body and makes it hard to breathe or think. In those moments, you may need to stop completely and just be with it. That’s okay. There’s no right or wrong way to approach this; it’s about finding what works for you in the moment.

For many, anxiety also comes from fear of the future. The unknown can feel terrifying. If you’re someone who feels this way, here’s a  suggestion: start by identifying what specifically scares you about the future. Is it a certain event? A conversation? A decision? Once you know what’s triggering your fear, ask yourself: what evidence do I have that this fear is real? Can I poke holes in that evidence? This process helps you separate the anxiety from reality.

Another approach is to create moments in your future that you can look forward to. Plan something small but joyful for the week ahead, like meeting a friend, watching your favorite show, or taking a walk in nature.

These moments can act as anchors, giving you something positive to anticipate.

Having someone by your side as you explore your anxiety can also make a huge difference. This doesn’t have to be someone who has all the answers or knows exactly how to help. They just need to be present. A calm and understanding presence can help you feel safe as you sit with your emotions. If you don’t have someone like that, even talking out loud to yourself or journaling can provide a similar sense of companionship.

Over time, as you practice sitting with your anxiety, you might notice a shift. Instead of dreading it, you may start to see it as an opportunity. Every time anxiety shows up, it’s bringing you a message from your subconscious. When you listen to it, you’re opening the door to greater awareness about yourself. You might even start to think, “What am I about to discover?” That curiosity can transform anxiety from a source of stress into a tool for growth.

Remember, this isn’t about “curing” anxiety or making it disappear. It’s about learning to live with it, to hold it, and to move forward alongside it. By reframing anxiety as a guide rather than an enemy, you give yourself the chance to grow and maybe even find some peace along the way.